It’s only bloody 2016, how did that happen?! The start of a new year always makes me reflect on the year gone by, and this one’s been a biggie! Here (in no particular order) are some of the things I’ve learnt since becoming a mum….
The first time out pushing a pram you really do feel like everyone’s staring at you as if you’ve stolen someone’s baby and/or you have ‘totally incompetent’ stamped on your forehead
No matter how much you try to believe that your sleeping newborn is benefitting from being dragged to a baby sensory class, it seems unlikely. I vote cake and a sofa for those early weeks.
Fastening sleepsuit poppers is tougher than solving a Rubik’s cube at 2am. Don’t even get me started on buttons.
A sippy cup will go in every orifice except the mouth and then be lobbed across the room
It is possible to cry in despair and happiness within a matter of minutes
The homemade salt-free Thai green curry you spent age making will be spat out in disgust by your ungrateful offspring
The quest for the perfect feeding bib becomes the holy grail
The jumperoo will change your life. Fact.
What’s that rash? Should his bath be that hot? Am I feeding him too much? Am I feeding him too little……Motherhood= constant worrying
It really is true what people say about forgetting all about the pain of labour
Carrot stains everything (you have been warned)
The smell of fish lingers in baby skin creases
The whole weight loss through breastfeeding thing only seems to work for a lucky few
Eating a meal with two hands starts to feel weird
And even though you know how horrific sleep deprivation is, for some reason you will still want another baby
Saturday night in with a take-away and a bottle of prosecco is the new ‘big night out’. Who wants drinks spilt down them by drunk idiots anyway.
And who knows what 2016 will teach me?! Happy new year folks!